The one who sits at my feet....

I'm interrupting our series of posts of the vacation. This is a blog that has been on my mind. I just haven't had the time to sit and type. Vacation is that perfect time.

Carissa is officially 10 months. She has been my rather, ummm 'needy' child. She has had several sicknesses, she took forever to sleep through the night, I really had to train her on her nap schedule...So when I say needy, I really mean just different from the other children. However, they're all very different. She has required a little more of me.

She has always been a "mommy's girl." She loves her daddy, brothers, and sisters. But if mommy is in the room, she wants me. I have to confess there have been times of frustration with this. I have at times walked out of the room so that she doesn't see me, I have tiptoed by a room that she was in, I have shut doors so she can't see me... She is very content unless she see's me.

One of Carissa's favorite places is in my arms. She's also very content sitting on my lap or at my feet. She has sat at my feet while I washed dishes, got ready for church, read to the boys... It doesn't bother me now. I see it as a blessing.

God has shown me something amazing. Carissa knows who provides for her, she feels safe with me, she trusts me. Sure she can be 'content' with others or in other rooms of the house. But she is most content just sitting at my feet.

The Lord reminded me of the time that He was visiting His good friends Mary and Martha. (John 12:1-11; Luke 10:38-42) Martha was busy serving. She built up resentment to Mary, her sister, because she was sitting at Jesus' feet. Jesus quickly corrected Martha and said, "Martha, Martha, you are worried and bothered about so many things; but only one thing is necessary, for Mary has chosen the good part, which shall not be taken away from her."

See the connection I made was this. Carissa really wants and needs me. She knows that I feed her and that makes her very content. She knows that I protect her, and that makes her very comfortable. God is my Abba (Father), I need Him. He is my source of nutrition, both physically and spiritually. I get all I need from Him. So only one thing is "necessary," sitting at His feet.

What does that look like? Remember when I walk out of the room, Carissa cries. She wants to see me. I should desire to be that close to Christ my Savior. I should cry out to Him, when I don't feel His nearness or when I've turned my own way. Carissa crawls beside me, looks for me, and is completely content with just me! Wouldn't that be a wonderful thing if we desired our Abba in that way.

However we don't always see our 'need' for God. We think that we actually can do things on our own. Our attitude at times can almost be so prideful that we think God needs us! Think about it. He needs me to raise these children to follow Him, He needs me to help my friends, He needs me to serve, to tell people about Him... Truth is He doesn't! I love Numbers 22:23-30. In these verses God uses a DONKEY to get the attention of Balaam. I am quickly reminded that the God that created everything and who can destroy everything my His very words, doesn't need me.

God loves me and He desires all of me. That's why He tells Martha, only one thing is necessary and that is "sitting" at His feet. Like Carissa with me, I need to look for Him, desire to be with Him, cry out when I don't 'see' Him. It's so easy to get distracted with other things, like Carissa is when she doesn't see me, or like Martha was with serving Him. I pray that the Lord will help me today to be more like Mary or like Carissa is with me, because only one thing is necessary.